I don’t like Kentucky.
I’ll probably never forgive that god forsaken state for ruining my entire life, and here’s why:
On December 30th, 2017 the Salisbury family embarked on a trip to Nashville, Tennessee. Dylan bought me tickets to the Wild game in Nashville for Christmas, and he created this entire trip where he could buy a bunch of stuff from gift shops along the way. Our first stop was at the Louisville Slugger Museum. Luckily for me, Ellie was along for the trip, meaning we couldn’t do a full tour of the museum. We had just enough time to go in, let Dylan spend fourteen years in the gift shop, and leave with a personalized bat (that will never see the light of day, but rather sit in the black hole that is “Dylan’s collection of things”).
After Dylan ordered the bat, the lovely employee told us that it would be about 20 minutes until it was ready to pick up. I told Dylan to wait for the bat, and I would run to the parking garage (attached to the building- important information to remember) to take Ellie for a bathroom break before we get back on the road.
So, I get in the elevator of the Louisville Slugger Museum, press level three parking garage, go right up to our parking spot, and life was good. It was a brisk 17 degrees outside, so I grabbed our 12 pound baby satan, threw on my mittens, and walked to where the parking garage elevator and stairs were. These were not the stairs and elevator that I had just exited.
I press the button to go down, wait only a few seconds for the elevator to come up and step in… alone. Ellie refused to get in. (Home girl, LOVES the elevator. She’s always ready to wait in our building, knows that the “ding” signifies getting out, does great at hotels with the elevator, I mean it’s never been a problem) So I pull her, coax her, try to convince her, but she’s not having it. So instead of thinking there’s a reason, I get angry, scoop her up, and hit the “1” to go down.
The elevator was silent and slow,
and immediately it did not feel right. The little light hit the 2, and then never hit the 1. Ever. Unfortunately, I immediately panic. The worst thing that you should do, was the first thing I did. In my head, I think “maybe it’s broken going to the first floor, let me see if it will go back up” so I hit the 2, hit the 3, hit the buttons two more times, and then really start panicking.
Nothing is happening. I’m in the oldest, dirtiest, smallest elevator I’ve ever been in, and I’m losing my everloving mind. I hit the 2 and 3 about fourteen more times, look at Ellie (who’s really got to pee), and start crying. I stood still for probably only a minute, which felt like an hour, and then I started full on freaking out. I punched the doors, slapped the walls, hit the fireman call button, and held down the alarm button inside the elevator. The alarm button makes noise whenever you press it, so I’d hold it, let go, hold it, let go hoping someone heard me.
After what I’d consider probably four minutes (an eternity) I call 9-1-1. While waiting for the dispatcher to pick up, I hold down on the alarm consistently, kick the door, and continue crying as I feel the walls completely closing in and I realize that this unheated elevator, on the street in Kentucky, is where Ellie and I were going to die.
“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?” “Yeah, Hi, I’m currently stuck in an…” *ding* the door opened, I was on level 1, and I probably looked like I just saw a ghost to everyone on the street, but I was free. “Hello?” “Oh yeah, um, I was stuck in an elevator in the 8th street parking garage, but the doors just opened so I’m free. You might want to tell someone to fix it, because I thought I was going to die.” “Okay, well have a great day”
Right lady, my heart is beating at about 423 miles per minute, I’m positive Dylan will never hear the end of this, and I realized that I forgot poop bags for Ellie’s shit in Indy, but you have a great day too.
Since then, I can’t go in elevators alone, and if I do- I immediately get off on the nearest floor and take the stairs. Good job Kentucky, I’m never coming back. Side note, I should have listened to Ellie the entire time. She didn’t want to get in the elevator. She knew. From now on, we listen to our animals.
Sorry this didn’t have an amazing ending where I had to crawl up an elevator shaft or use my super human strength to pry open the door, but I did realize that my phone battery at that point was at 61% so i knew I had very little time left & I was thankful that God opened the door and let Ellie and I live another day. But the Wild lost that night so…